Dating a ginger jokes
And, for the record, when I say “all of your fates”, I mean you dummies who watch the show, and want to kick gingers because of it. So when the SP 150 and SPF 200 start becoming commonplace, while you sun worshipers scoff at the idea of anyone needing such a strong solar shield, we will silently horde it all for ourselves. I mean the people who turn their noses up at the very idea of a ginger child. And when the Earth inches ever-so-closer to burning up, like a steak left far too long on the grill, you might well show up at the gates of Redheadday, on your knees, begging us for a slather of sweet, sweet, sun protection.
You mainly see fake redheaded women, but dudes get into the act as well. The more people who get corrupted by their desire to be just like a real-live ginger, then the easier it becomes for us to attain our ultimate goal.Why Even Doctors Fear Us As I mentioned earlier, 2% of us are natural redheads.But at least 2% of you guys and girls are fake redheads. Are you aware that an entire festival exists, devoted entirely to us? No, we’re just plotting to take over the entire planet, like Pinky and The Brain wanted to but never could.If we don’t keep our temper in check while living our everyday lives, then we’re probably going to screw ourselves out of at least one job opportunity, and more than a few relationships.
Luckily, the Ginger Vasion isn’t about building relationships or keeping a job.
So consider this your warning: go down to your nearest comic book store, find an issue of Red Hulk, study it, and weep for your future. Tired of us enslaving your people and taking your lovers for our own? Even those of us who haven’t used extensive medication to get big ol’ muscly arms are going to put up a fight.
And even if you get lucky and hit us, it’s gonna be real hard to keep us down.
For too long, my brethren and I have sat idly by, while you and your stupid little buddies mock us. After that, we’ll take an inventory and see how much enslaving still needs to be done. Here’s yet one more reason to not mess with us: everything you’ve heard about the redhead temper? It’s not always the best trait to have, to be sure.
No, we’ll just have to try and try again, until we at least make it up to 5%. We don’t take a lot of crap lying down and, if we’re going to invade your towns and take over, we’re going to do it with the ferocity of 100,000 rabid wolverines, crossed with another 100,000 honey badgers.
Icecaps are melting, and the ozone layer is still thinning out.