Dealing with online dating rejection
The way I see it, better he NOT chose you and waste your time or save you heartache and disappointment later. There are a myriad of reasons YOU reject guys online as well.
If you have ever dared to date, you are probably a reject. Of course, as the Young Woman in my book Are You My Boyfriend? Time and again she is told no: “No, I’m not your boyfriend, I’m emotionally unavailable.” “No, I’m not your boyfriend, I’m more into your friend.” “No, I’m not your boyfriend, I’d rather spend my time moping about the last girl who let me down.” No, no, no is all she hears, so what does Young Woman do? She meets someone else, trusts in possibility, and even when disappointment follows, she keeps moving forward.Although rejection can often have nothing to do with you, if you find this seems to be happening all too often it might be wise to reassess your approach to see if you are perpetuating the same mistakes. This can be a real turn off, especially if you only just connected online. Using inappropriate language, coming on too strong or making too many assumptions too quickly, can all be reasons why you’re not getting the responses you want or any responses at all.Best rule of thumb is to keep it light and friendly in the initial stages until you know a little more about your online interest.– If you’re not quite getting the amount of responses you’re hoping for, or if the quality of those responses is far from appealing, there are some things you can do to improve your chances. Dating is weird, and often uncomfortable, and anyone brave enough to put themselves out there, to spend valuable time with a person statistically unlikely to be their match, deserves a medal. I try to always keep some important truths in mind: I am responsible for my own happiness, it is totally natural for me to desire a romantic partner, and if I take care of myself and keep trying, everything will work out.I hope it’s okay to have a cartoon as a role model, because I want to be just like her.Believe me, most men are so much better at this online dating thing than we are. (But keep in mind that men, especially men dating in their 40s, 50s and beyond, still have the same dating challenges we do; sometimes worse.) So just know this, and heed my advice to let the feeling of online rejection wash over you.
They get told ‘no’ wayyyy more than we do, but they understand that this is a process, accept that and keep going. Let’s separate true rejection with what you consider as online rejection. Guys in their older years have the statistical advantage – there are more of us (women over 40 looking for love) and fewer of them (men over 40 doing the same). “I’d figure he probably went off to live his busy life and, since he didn’t really know me, I just kind of dropped out of his mind. Also heed my advice about how to make online dating work best for you. One advantage to being a woman over 40 is that you have the perspective of a life well lived.
Here are 4 things to know to help you move forward in the online dating world with your self-esteem intact! All a guy knows about you is 20 sentences and a few mediocre pictures.
If they don’t “pick” you, take a deep breath and remember: There are 1000 reasons a guy won’t be interested and 999 of them have nothing to do with YOU.
Whether it’s for something casual or even if you’re looking for the love of your life, online dating has definitely secured its audience.
But despite being a concept that reeks of modernity participants still face a downside that has been a by-product of dating since the dawn of time – rejection.
Nobody likes it, but everyone experiences it, when they dip their toes into the murky waters of the dating pool.